It’s 4a.m.
& no birds sing

sleep has fled:
you, in your
hot dreams

all boy / man
sprawled limbs
so silent,
silent like the tomb

are far from me.

We had a life
didn’t we?

A love affair
on steroids
a gift from
jealous Gods

a passion
like no other
it burnt me:

it burns me still.

It’s 4a.m.
& no birds sing

you, far away
call me from dream.

I asked you
today, if it had
turned out
the other way

if we’d walked
the aisle all
white froth, old lace

what would you
have missed?

Just what,
in these years
we’ve spent apart

all fourteen now,

would have been
lost to you if our
hands had banded gold?

If we had dared
to live my impossible
wish?

Lived & loved
together.

Tonight you
laughed
a wistful tune,

you laughed
softly
& sadly said.

‘ Nothing’.